Unhappily Ever After

After failing to get one of the three VCRs (even the one that requires you to continuously press the ""play"" button) from Jennifer in the divorce, Jack sells his car to an old lady and buys himself a new one. Mr. Floppy gets excited because they can watch porno (Natural Born Hooters). Jennifer gets upset because its their first marriage anniversary after the break up, and Jack forgets what day it is. Jennifer invites Jack over for dinner and cons him into feeling that they ought to exchange gifts, and he gives her the new VCR, while she gives him the crappy one. Mr. Floppy gets mad at Jack for giving away the new VCR, and Jack makes the mop and pizza box talk to demonstrate that he doesnt need Mr. Floppy.

In order to become more successful at attracting a new man, Jennifer wants Jack to buy her new breasts. When he refuses, she tries to sell her engagement ring and finds out it is glass and 14 karat goldette, and becomes upset. Jack, against the wishes of Mr. Floppy, decides to sell his autographed baseball in order to buy her a new ring. Jennifer tells him that the ball was really autographed by her mother. Jack and Jennifer have sex at the end of the episode.

Jennie, Ross, and Ryan are sick in bed with colds, and Tiffany has two days until the Alphi Pi Psi party at the local university, where she plans to mingle with the geeks since ""todays big dufus is tomorrows Bill Gates."" Jennifer calls Jack over so that he can pick up food and tampons, and get the car from the mechanic. Mr. Floppy makes Jack to take him along so that he wont be bored in the apartment, and then convinces Jack to escape to Mexico. Jack turns back home after a ""conscious attack,"" gets yelled at for buying the wrong flavor lollipops, and is stopped from running to Mexico again because he ran out of gas in the driveway. Jack and Jennifer have sex in the front seat of the car at the end.

Jennifer wants to get into the Betty Ford Clinic so that she can meet a rich drunk, and tells Jack hell have to take the kids when she is away for the week. Hell have to pay for her visit or hell have the kids forever. Jack takes the kids for the night and Ross cuts off Mr. Floppys foot so that he can have a good luck charm to break his string of bad luck. Ryan steals the foot from Ross, and uses it get a date with Cindy Stalling (whom he dreams of every night). Moments later Tiffany steals it from him, and he promptly loses Cindy, but Tiffany finds a diamond ring in her sandwich. Jennifer gets tips from Maureen on how to fit in at the Clinic. Jennifer takes the foot from the kids and wont give it to Jack because it got her into Betty Ford. Jack unsuccessfully tries to offer Mr. Floppy a new foot from a different stuffed animal, then breaks into Jennifers house and gets noticed by everyone. Never the less, he steals the foot from Jennifer, and she promptly gets bumped from the Cl

Jennifer goes out with Gavin Drake, ""Picture Framer of the Stars,"" and falls for him because its the best date she has had so far. Tiffany and Ryan learn that he is a married man at school lunch because he is the father of Chelsea, one of their friends. They tell Jack, and he gets excited because hell get to crush Jennie by telling her, and itll be the best thing that has happened to him all year. Mr. Floppy wants him to wait telling her so that he can get gossip about Shannon Doherty out of Gavin. Jack doesnt get to tell her because Gavin asks her to be his mistress. Jeannie seriously considers it, but breaks up with him because it would be too much for her conscience.

Jennifer is chaperoning Tiffanys spring dance. Tiffany is in charge of planning the dance, and has invested the funds into war-oriented stocks. Unfortunately, peace breaks out and her investments go bad. Jack has to return his new J. Bean wardrobe (that Mr. Floppy says makes him look like a gay-boy) in order to help fund the dance. Jennifer makes Jack help her with and take her to the dance. Ryan ends up with 10 dates because the girlfriends of the football team want to get even with the team for getting a stripper the week before. The theme of the dance is ""The O.J. Trial Under the Stars,"" and Barry wins Queen of the Prom.

Jack moves back in to the house for the sake of the kids, but must live in the basement until he can win Jennie back.

Jack leaves Jennies room for the basement because she wont let him have his ways, but he finds a giant rat in the basement and makes the kids get rid of it.

When Jennie gets a date with Ray Paul Jones, her teen crush, she gives Jack the right to fantasize about a celebrity. Jack picks Cindy Crawford and gets arrested for stalking her.

Jennie gets a glass table on Rosss ninth birthday and throws everyone out of the house for getting the table dirty.

When Ryan gets all Ds and Fs on his report card, Jennie says he cant have the car keys until he gets a B, so he makes a deal with Miss Taylor, his Civics teacher. Meanwhile, Jack tries to figure out why Ryan is so dumba nd Tiffany begins to suspect that the mailman is her father.

When Ryan starts taking urine tests for football players, he gets a lettered jersey and the respect of a football player. Meanwhile, no one notices Tiffany, because of Ryan being on the football team, when she gets the highest SAT scores in the school and becomes a national merrit scholar.

After seeing a movie, Jennie takes the family to a picnic to bond. But the picnic trip is soon ruined by gophers, poison ivy, and pesticide.

When the family becomes obsessed with horoscopes, Ryan looks for a girl and Jennie tries to be nice.

Jack uses his height to beat Ryan at basketball for the 2001st time.

Jack starts writing stories that are really Floppys and gets a big break, but later tries doing his own writing.

Its summer break Ryan has just finished his senior year. After Ryan gets fired from the used car lot, Jack threatens to kick him out of the house if he doesnt get a job. So Ryan goes to Cheeseburger Community College, but finds he must repeat his senior year. Jack tries to keep the family out of the basement and works the night shift so he doesnt have to deal with the kids.

At the start of the school year, Sable, a girl who is as smart and beautiful as Tiffany, comes to Priddy High and Tiffany and her become rivals after exhcanging secrets.

When Tiffany starts taking fake prom pictures with nerds and leaving sexy messages on their answering machines for the money, it blows her Princeton scholarship.

After getting zapped by lightning, Ryan is convinced that he is a super hero named Lightning Boy.

The Mad Hair Hacker goes after Tiffany, Sable, and Amber, a friend of Tiffanys, to chop their long hair. Meanwhile, Jack and Jennie look forward to terrorizing the neighborhood kids and giving them candy cigarettes on Halloween.

When Sable starts playing a sport for her scholarship, Tiffany joins the volleyball team.

Jack and Jennie think Ryan is on drugs when they finds globs and globs of his sweat in the car.

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Jack cant stand it when Tiffany begins dating Johnny Stompanado, a biker. Jennie remembers her biker boyfriend.

Tiffany gets a B- on her essay because she doesnt agree with Mr. Monteleones, her teachers, opinion. Ryan repeats everything Mr. Monteleone tells him for his reports and does great. Meanwhile, Jack and Mr. Floppy decide to make a movie with naked women.

Tiffany must work at an ice cream parlor.

Jack goes to a loan shark for the $18,000 for Tiffany to go to Harvard. But Tiffany turns down the Harvard scholarship and decides to go to Northridge Junior College with Ryan when she meets Professor Alfred, a professor there. She soon finds Professor Alfred is going to teach at Harvard and Mr. Monteleone is taking his spot.

When Tiffany gets to be the gossip writer for the school newspaper, she writes a story about Mr. Monteleone loving sheep.

Guy Macaroon tells the family that Jennie has died by falling asleep on a tanning machine. So the family must give her a good funeral to stop her ghost from pestering them.

Mindy, a girl on the basketball team with a crush on Ryan, beats him in basketball. Ryan is embarassed when Mindy tells the whole school, so he challenges her to a rematch witht he school watching.

After being denied by Bunny Mufflewits for a date, Ryan gets the mark to be a vampire slayer and uses Tiffany and Ross for bait.

When Tiffany breaks up a couple by asking the guy for the time, she begins to think he is her boyfriend, without meeting him. Ryan starts getting sympathy from girls who have been dumped.

Barbara, the attractive new girl at Northridge Junior Colege who is a network executive, flirts with Jack. Jennie and Tiffany tell Jack to flirt back so that they can get a network meeting.

Ryan must work as the night janitor to pay off a school computer he destroyed. He finds the answers to an exam in the trash can and starts selling them to other students.

Tiffany plans on losing her virginity to her new boyfriend, but she finds he is saving himself for marriage.

When Tiffany goes on a weekend ski trip and wakes up in bed and tied up with her skies, she decides to think back to what happen, while Ryan says that he beated up the Abominal Snowman and while Ross witnesses Jack and Jeannie having a high old time while Tiffany and Ryan were away.

When figuring out that she is now 20, Tiffany remodels her room and thinks that she is old, while Jack and Jeannie fight over who is her most favorite parent.

When Ross nails shut the front door in order for everyone except Jeannie to watch his five hour story, Jack, Tiffany, and Ryan think about (in order of names before) Floppy and Women and Beer, Clothes Clothes Clothes, and Lightning boy.

Tiffany gets angry when she must run errands for A. Cyril Studebaker, her literatue teacher, to get an A.

Tiffany is annoyed when Jerome, her sensitive boyfriend, wont stand up to rude people at a movie.

After Tiffany remembers Ryan locking her in a closet ten years before, Tiffany makes phone calls to Ryan telling him to beware of the closet monster. Ryan finds Jack, Barbara, and Ross dead and suspects Tiffany.

Tiffany faces off against Barbara in a fencing competition so she can get a good job.

Elliot, the school newspaper editor, sues Tiffany for sexual harassment when she tries to get him a front page story. Ryan gets to take over the horoscopes in the school paper.

Jack sells expensive toilets illegally so Ryan and Tiffany can buy a Porsche.

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While Tiffany and Barbara write up their applications for college, Tiffany makes a lie about knowing how to play the violin, but finds out that she has to play even though she doesnt really know how.

While dating a guy, Tiffany decides that he might be the one to lose her virginity to, but then Barbara gets in the way.

Tiffany has to paint a picture for art class, but gets them mixed up with Ryans and starts to be a success, but feels bad about using his work for success.

In the final episode, Tiffany is finally accepted into Harvard but without financial aid. To get enough money for Tiffany, he becomes a successful used car salesman and soon moves up to selling new cars and cars to celebrities. But Mr. Floppy dies because Jack is so caught up in his work, he wont pay attention to him. But drinking beer with Jak brings Floppy back.