Barney Miller

A bomber targets the 12th Precinct, as Det. Fish contemplates retirement.

An old friend of Barneys is assigned to investigate allegations of corruption in the squadroom; Chano is after an obscene phone caller.

Well-meaning nosy neighbors overrun a covert stakeout operation.

An overzealous lady cop ruffles the feathers of the testosterone-run 12th; Chano nabs an obscene phone caller. Linda Lavin (""Alice"") debuts as Detective Janice Wentworth.

The 12th Precinct reluctantly guards a mob witness; Chano uses his co-workers own cash stash to set up a narcotics buy.

A scruffy ""Serpico""-type cop has good reason to hide behind unruly hair; Bernice discovers that Fish spent the afternoon in a massage parlor.

A disgruntled man with a belt of dynamite threatens to blow himself and the squad room sky high unless President Nixon agrees to speak with him; the plumbing goes kaput; Wojo arrests a phony man-of-the-cloth.

Barney, Fish and Yemana feel the crunch when a labor layoff forces them to do without Chano, Harris and Wojo; a manicurist goes deeper than the nail; a morose stockbroker takes to petty theft.

A wife claims spousal abuse; Wojo and Wentworth are bait for a park rapist.

Wojo and Wentworth pose as marrieds in order to bust a burglary ring set in a posh hotel.

Barney smells a rat when two pounds of confiscated marijuana disappears from the evidence locker, and a homeless man spends the night in a department store—apparently one of many.

During a very rainy day, the squad must endure both the precinct roof threatening to collapse, and VERY bad Bicentennial jokes from a nightclub comedian-the stationhouse roof literally groaning in response!!

A man is convinced that a photo of Jean Harlow is his missing wife; a pair of lady cops makes an overzealous drug bust.

On New Years Eve, Fish tries to stop a jumper, and Wojo delivers a baby.

Wojo must escort a bigamist to Cleveland, even though he is (guess!) afraid of flying. Meanwhile,the bigamists New York wife shows up. Also, a man turns in an unmarked envelope containing $3500 in cash.

Wentworth busts a dime-store cowboy in a massage parlor, and the detectives bust an octogenarian mugger.

Fish is attracted to the mother of a young mugger; a man is a bit premature to obtain the unclaimed windfall he found on the street.

Wojo is dismayed to discover that the city doesnt have up-to-date evacuation procedures in the event of an emergency; Fish meets Jilly Pappalardo, a young thief who he will eventually care for in the ""Barney"" spin-off ""Fish.""

The quarantined 12th Precinct tries to make it through the night: Lugar has a talk with Marty and Daryl Driscoll; and Harris has a loud rant in his sleep.

Election Day at the One-Two includes: A woman, being held from voting by her husband, throws a toilet seat into the street to get attention; a shoplifter gets escorted to vote by Wojo, who promptly loses him; and Inspector Lugar comes electioneering for a old time political hack.

A latter-day prophet claims the end is near - 5:30, to be precise; a man who hasnt left his apartment since World War II is brought in for refusing to serve jury duty. John Cassisi appears as Victor Kreutzer, a role he would continue to play on ""Fish.""

A power failure darkens spirits at the 12th, where they play host to a man with a split personality.

Wojo brings hashish-laced brownies his new girlfriend made to the 12th Precinct, getting the detective squad stoned; while an actor and critic (""natural enemies"" says Harris) square off with dueling swords.

An evicted tenant greets a landlord with a musket; Barneys charged with harassment when he books a blind shoplifter.

The 12th may go up in smoke, to the delight of a suicidal couple.

Weary of waiting for promotion, Levitt announces that hes quitting the force; Barney investigates a sex clinic that borders on brothel status; Harris investigates a rash of crimes ostensibly committed by a juvenile.

Marty is picked up for parole violation with a half ounce of marijuana; Wojo prematurely grants a Russian defector asylum.

An impending strike is on everyones mind, except the woman who was robbed by her computer date. (Part 1 of 2)

A neighborhood vigilante group runs amok, and Fish is AWOL on the day of his retirement.

Listening devices discovered in the squad room may have come from Internal Affairs - or the Nixon administration!

Retired Sergeant Fish returns to assist Barney in locating a pilfered corpse.

A blizzard holes up the 12th with an unwelcome guest—a corpse; a self-proclaimed prophet is sure that the weather is indicative of a new ice age.

The detectives clean up after three mental patients sit down to Thanksgiving dinner at an automat.

Neither the bomb squad nor the government recognizes a college students physics project as a functional atomic bomb - but Detective Dietrich does.

The detectives are unimpressed with a man who claims hes being visited by a poltergeist - that is, until they lock the man up and strange events begin occurring about the squad room.

The city legalizes off-track gambling, to the delight of Yemana; a woman wants her husband arrested on a rape charge; a master of disguise perpetuates a crime spree.

The hotel situation now involves a SWAT team, while Dietrich learns the identity of his amnesic ""girlfriend.""

Barney uncovers, if you will, the real reason behind a womans vehement insistence that a nude-painting exhibit at a local art gallery be shut down; the Millers may be heading for divorce.

The members of the squad nervously await Barney filling out their evaluation forms. Meanwhile, Harris arrests a numerologist who will only give his name as ""1223,"" and a porno shop reporting vandalism turns out to be a mom and pop operation being hassled by their kids.

Harris does some extensive soul searching when hes offered a job on the mayors security team.

Wojo delivers the ransom money for the department store owner, while the prostitute charms both Wojo and the victims nebbish son.

The German Shepherd that bit Wojo may be rabid; Barney and Liz prepare for their impending separation.

An accusation of an indiscretion on the part of Dietrich leads to a visit from the gleeful Lieutenant Scanlon of Internal Affairs; Yemana books a rabbi who is running a gambling casino in his synagogue.

Barney notes some uncharacteristic behavior from Yemana; a client cant get a tattoo artist to remove his work; Harris books a youthful loan shark

A stockbroker leaves Wall Street to become a beggar; a rookie cop, assuming Harris to be a felon, shoots at him.

Feuding toy makers create a disturbance; Barney faces his first holiday as a separated man; a claustrophobic prisoner has an understandable problem with the cage.

Lieutenant Scanlon returns, this time attempting to ferret out corruption with a lie detector; Barney is suspicious of a furriers robbery report.

Wojo decides to move in with his girlfriend; Mr. Brauer tells his wife that hes leaving to become a mercenary. This was a pilot for a potential spin-off series, each week focusing on one of the cops off-duty lives.

Barney feels the onrush of Father Time; Dietrich books an Olympic hopeful who practices his javelin toss in Central Park; a Hassidic Jew is the target of a diamond thief.

The 12th Precinct hosts an open house, attracting only vagrants; Barneys joy at moving back home is cut short by the hotel manager that refuses to refund him his upcoming months rent; Wojo and Harris try to get a lead on an arsonist.

A computer firm has difficulty retrieving embezzled funds; an educated young man claims to be under the influence of a voodoo curse.

The cast step out of character to offer a tribute to Jack Soo, who died during the shows fifth season.

A tranquil prisoner claims to be Jesus Christ, which is timely for the drug dealer caught with an impressive stash; an elderly mugger poses as a photographer to ensnare lonely women.

A visiting monk opts for a quick dalliance with a lady of the streets; Barney discovers to his horror that Dietrich may not be cut out for mugging detail—especially since it must be done in drag.

A bookstore owner is infuriated when a strip club opens near his place of business; and man is convinced that he is on the verge of spontaneous combustion.

A former master criminal becomes a walking zombie following his lobotomy; a man is unable to use the telephone after being mugged because hes Amish. Jeff Corey, who appeared previously as ""The Prisoner,"" was a renowned acting teacher.

The detectives search for a missing viral strain stolen from a lab; a woman is convinced that her husband is actually a clone.

Weary of an uncooperative populace, a census taker goes to drastic measures to make a head count; beleaguered apartment dwellers band together and capture a burglar.

Harris disappears while undercover as a vagrant; Luger elects to be demoted rather than to retire.

Wojo fears that a despondent Luger is planning to do himself in; a man seeking to reclaim his television set robs the police vault; a rash of bizarre robberies leads to an eccentric gun collector.

A lottery winner dispenses of the prize money by tossing it out a window; Sgt. Dietrich is arrested for his off-duty participation at an anti-nuclear rally; Barney discovers he cant afford his condo-converted apartment.

A disgruntled architect decides to improve on his building—by blowing it up.

Barney is down in the dumps when he is passed over again for deputy inspector

Harris woos the precincts crime photographer, while Dietrich tracks down the hit mans intended target; Barneys frustration boils over when the new homicide-only edict results in the death of an old friend.

The new detective is convinced that his compatriots are on the take and asks to be dealt out.

Dorsey takes a protective stance to a young prostitute; Harris is getting stock tips from another one; and Dietrich is tempted by all of them as he experiments with celibacy.

Someone is sending specific information on transgressions of the men to Internal Affairs; Harris sets up a reunion between an elderly cat burglar and the wife who reported him missing years ago.

A blind mugging victim and an overzealous charity collector are among the disparate audience members at the screening of Harris overbudget film.

A deaf woman is arrested for prostitution; Barney anxiously awaits news of Wojo, who dived into the Hudson River in pursuit of a looter.

Ripner is suing Harris over the lawyers portrayal in the detectives novel; Wojo asks Barneys daughter out on a date; a sporting-goods storeowner takes the law in his own hands.

When Barney spends the night in jail, the squad room is left in the natty hands of Sergeant Harris.

The verdict is in on the Harris/Ripner libel suit, and a woman threatens to blow up the squad room with a homemade bomb. What better time for Detective Fish to drop by for a visit?

The detectives are reluctant to wear their new bulletproof vests; Luger interviews them in case of the need for a quick obituary.

Harris is forced to liquidate his possessions to pay off his lawsuit.

Luger wants Barney to pen a letter for his mail-order bride; a lottery winner seeks revenge when the ticket seller loses his winning entry; Harris gets a new book deal.

A husband is assaulted for forcing his wife into designer jeans; a disorderly conduct report leads to a man who swears hes possessed by an evil spirit.

A manufacturer of computer game processors is accused of espionage; a WAC supplements her income on the street.

The penultimate survivor of a tontine attempts suicide in order to concede the money to his cousin.

Street clowns fall prey to a serial mugger; a hundred inmates are sneaked out of holding in the middle of the night.

Unless he confesses soon, Harris and Dietrichs unwilling roommate may witness another murder. Meanwhile, harassment charges are pressed against Lieutenant Scanlon.

Lugers mail-order bride arrives; an elderly woman mugs a man.

Internal Affairs is called in when a charge of excessive force is leveled against Wojo; an angry parent takes action when his child is declined admission into an exclusive kindergarten.

Harris and Arnold come to blows; a mugging victim confesses to a twenty-five year old crush on Barney.

Wojos discover of an ancient weapon puts the 12th Precinct up for sale.

Friends, foes and felons alike drop by to pay their last respects as the detectives prepare to leave for new assignments; Harris contemplates his resignation when hes assigned to Flushing Meadows; Barney recalls friends departed before he turns out the squad room lights for the last time.